It's All In The Mind

Lately I've been experiencing dreams where I seemingly woke up from sleep, got up from bed and did my morning prayers before I suddenly realized 'oh fuck, I'm still in a dream' and woke up again to find that I'm still in bed.

The farthest I've been in this 'dreamwithinadream' is when I've prepared my breakfast and was just sitting down to eat them before I realized that it was only a dream. True enough, I woke up to find myself in bed with no breakfast.

Fuck.

Shit is annoying at first, but soon it got creepy. It shows that you aren't actually 100% in control of your body; even though you think you're living your life, it may be that you're actually just living a dreamlike existence all those while, and what you'll find when you really wake up is not going to be very pleasant.

Case in point, I was rudely shook by the fact that I haven't prepared breakfast when I've been dreaming of sitting down to eat a delicious meal. Imagine if I continued dreaming past breakfast and actually proceed through my daily activities, all the while dreaming of it all. I might've gone on to sleep the whole day, and what a rude shock that would be if I managed to wake up at all. Assuming I can wake up and not succumb to the dreamlike existence I've lived for the last 24 hours.

It's not unlike the movie The Matrix, where intelligent computers have enslaved human beings by putting their minds in a simulated reality (similar to a prolonged dream) so that they think they're living their daily life: walking, talking and eating; when in reality, they're curled up in a fetal position, submerged in amniotic fluid with wires connected to their brains, their minds constantly fed with streams of information to simulate the 'real world'.

I believe that given an optimum sleeping condition, a person having this kind of dream can go on sleeping for weeks, convinced that he is living his 'real' life. Perhaps it will actually delay aging (similar to cold sleep) or whatever, but I don't want to know what happens when that person wakes up after living his 'life' for so long. Madness might only be the beginning.

Maybe this blog post hasn't really happened, and I'm actually still in bed and dreaming about it.

It's all in the mind

Botak

Easy Way To Reduce Smoking

There have been plenty of antismoking campaigns conducted over the years but little, if any, effects can be seen. Smoking is still popular. Fortunately I've found out an easy way to reduce smoking on a national, nay, global level.

Here's the lowdown:

Cigarettes contains chemicals, plenty of which are poisonous to the human body. In fact, there are 599 additives in a cigarette which you can read the full list here. Upon burning, cigarettes create more than 4000 chemical compounds. In short, cigarettes are poisonous, and everybody knows that (even the smokers).

My proposal thus is simple. The government should order cigarette manufacturers, on pain of imprisonment, to create a batch of special cigarette, identical in appearance and taste, except that this special batch contain a fast-acting and highly lethal poison, such as dimethylmercury or ricin. Anyone unfortunate enough to smoke this special cigarette will instantly die of poisoning.

These poisonous cigarettes would then be randomly inserted into packets of normal cigarettes, which are then distributed across the country. The packets containing the poisonous cigarettes shall not be marked in any way to indicate its 'special' content. In other words, it should look like a normal packet. Remember also that the poisonous cigarette will look identical to its normal counterpart, so there's nothing to give the secret away. Thus the average smoker, upon opening a packet of cigarettes, should not be able to tell which cigarette in the pack is the poisonous ones.

I postulate cigarette consumption to drop drastically after this strategy is introduced, as smokers wouldn't want to gamble their life by smoking a poisonous cigarette by accident. This should prove to be a huge incentive towards quitting smoking, and hopefully it would deter the newbie smokers as well.

The way I see it, cigarettes already contain poisons, albeit slow-acting ones. Therefore I see no harm in putting fast-acting poisons for a change. At the very least, it would lend the act of smoking a little bit of risk and adventure, as the reckless smoker pulls a cigarette out of the packet, not knowing if this is the one that would end his life. It's a lot like Russian roulette, only with cigarettes.

Some variations on this poisonous cigarette strategy are radioactive cigarettes and exploding cigarettes. Instead of fast-acting poison, the special batch could be exposed to radioactivity, which would inflict the hapless smoker with radiation poisoning. Or special cigarettes could be formulated to explode upon ignition. Its effectiveness can be spectacularly improved by having the cigarette explode a few seconds after being burned, so that it would explode while being inhaled.

I will forward this idea to the appropriate authorities.

Thanks for reading

Botak

P/s: I'm just playing, smokers; you know I love you.

How To Leave A Room Like A Respectable Man/Woman?

I always watched people taking a lot of time when they were leaving a social function, both formal and informal. They've stated their desire to leave, but at the very last second, they launch into another round of conversation or another nibble of the food or a sip of the drink. Some people even resume conversation after they've shaken hands and are heading to the door.

I used to believe that delaying your leave of a function is a sign of courtesy to the host, but the negative effects often outweigh the benefits. I've watched my parents argue countless times because one person would take a long time in taking their leave of a function, while the other waited furiously in the car. I bet this happens to a lot of other couples as well, and this habit could cause a weak marriage to collapse.

I've seen people missing their homeward transport because they were still talking or eating even though they were supposed to wait at the bus stop 30 minutes ago. Then they had to inconvenience other people into picking them up or begging the host for a place to stay the night. That's definitely not a good example of guest etiquette.

People who have a lot of functions to attend in a day cannot afford to dillydally in leaving, yet a lot of people do this exact thing and end up not attending the last or farthest functions. This tarnishes their social reputation; yet they wonder why people aren't coming to their functions. At worst, delaying your leave of a function can kill you; if you need to spend hours driving back home after attending a function, delaying your leave will result in you driving in a tired state and increases the risk of traffic collision.

Finally, delaying your departure from a function is a waste of your time. The way I see it, you should leave on time today so you can socialize again tomorrow.

Brent and Kate McKay over at the Art of Manliness wrote a very exceptional post on how to leave aroom like a man. However, I believe that women should read the post too and learn how to exit a room without dillydallying as I've seen a lot of women do just that. Hopefully the reader, man or woman, will gain something out of it.

Thanks for reading

Botak